Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Rebecca's Balancing Act: A Roller Coaster Ride

The interesting thing about writing a weekly post for me is that when I write it, I find that I have all kinds of perspective on the week and that my posts don't really reflect the roller coaster I often actually experience.  When I look back at this week, I feel pretty good about it, but within each actual day it varied from extreme frustration with myself and my eating habits, to utter gluttony and indulgence and a dismissal of all healthy habits, to exceptionally healthy eating and exercise.  All things considered, it was a good week.  But the roller coaster is exhausting.

The week started back up with more Taco Bell.  It's not that it tastes 'good' per say, but it tastes comfortable.  I find it soothing to eat and it kind of numbs me out.  After last week's work with coach Ellen, it really annoyed me that I was still making stupid unhealthy eating choices.

That led to a day or two of intense frustration with myself, though not really a change in habits.

Then, Damian suggested that we start eating really healthy 6 days a week, and super-indulge on Sundays.  I had done that many years ago and it proved really effective with my black and white personality.  So I turned Friday into "Sunday" and ate, among other things, a box of Eggos.  And cream sauce over pasta.  And a fair amount of rum.  The next day I PAID.  OMG was I sick (can you say "Duh"?). My body was so mad at me.  I won't go into the gory details, you've probably been there.  So that brought me back to juicing for a day just to be gentle with myself.  Then, the next day was a combo of juicing and healthy meals, and a lovely walk in the park with Damian.  And now I am writing this post.

Roller coaster!  But since it ended well, like most roller coaster rides do, I fell okay.  But I am REALLY hoping that getting that sick a few days ago will help me stay with healthier choices.  Fingers crossed.  At least if we do the indulgence days I ought to keep them gluten and dairy free cuz, damn!

The GREAT news is that my mom and I had our first on-the-phone meal planning date this week, and I planned out meal for two nights - Stuffed Peppers for dinner last night and Potato Spinach soup for dinner this coming Wednesday.  The peppers turned out REALLY well and Damian really liked them.  That is saying a lot because he's been making stuffed peppers for decades, but beef and lamb based, so to make a gluten free vegan option and have him really enjoy it is a big success!  Yea!  But the biggest success for me is that I got into the kitchen and cooked. 

I feel so uncomfortable in the kitchen.  I want to get to a place where cooking feels easy and doesn't intimidate me.  And I know that within a month or two, if I keep up the planning dates with mom and the twice-a-week cooking, I'll get there.  

My favorite thing since the wedding, though, is that I am focusing on taking time for myself and for my marriage.  We spend evenings either watching a show together or reading by the fire (my favorite). I try to stop work by 6 or 7, and I am loving how much time it feels like I have.  And stuff is getting done anyway.  It's kind of amazing.  I am also taking both Sundays and Mondays off from clients and design-work.  What?!  A whole weekend?  it's kind of awesome.  I still do stuff related to work - today I am working on a speech I'll give tomorrow, and calling references for the assistant I want to hire, and might even create a newsletter to send out, but no design work.  And I'll try to get out for an extra hike (though we went out yesterday, so it would just be a bonus).  So excited to hire an assistant, and so nervous!

THIS WEEK'S KEY TO SUCCESS: Eating so much gluten and dairy that it reminded me why I don't eat those.

THIS WEEK'S PERSONAL CHALLENGE: Cook twice, take a hike.

Pic 1 - Out with Damian in the gorgeous weather for a hike and a picnic - amazing afternoon!

Pic 2 - Revamped office all set up and ready for an assistant, now to find the right one....


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